Center for Relationship Equality

 Sampler

An Excerpt from The 50/50 Marriage by Gayle Kimball, Ph.D.

How to Succeed in Love

Copyright 2000 Gayle Kimball, Ph.D.

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Chapter Goals

This chapter discusses how to succeed in selecting a mate and nurturing an intimate relationship. Most of us want a vital and egalitarian relationship, but the fact that more than half of the recent marriages end in divorce is alarming. Our culture trains us for divorce by teaching us that love is about excitement and being an adult means hiding most of our feelings. Yet, intimacy is based on disclosure, and love is about comfort, trust, deep caring, respect, humor, expansiveness, having compatible goals, interests and values, and enjoying each other on a daily basis. Love is not just thrills and chills. Day-to-day domesticity is not usually exciting, although it can stimulate profound growth, and be deeply affectionate and satisfying.

Lessening perceptual differences regarding key factors in your relationship can help determine your readiness for marriage. Take the time to individually complete this survey and then compare your answers -- Exploring Personal Perspectives Prior to Marriage -- A Survey Creating Increased Self-Knowledge